Soapstars (20:30, Monday 24th September, ITV)
Hey, it's just like popstars, but the participants act badly instead of sing horrifically. And the judges are equally as bitchy, and the incidental music exactly the same. An interesting idea - but by giving the final five roles in Emmerdale, surely no one wins?
Dream Team (20:00, Sunday 23rd September, Sky One)
Sky's footballing soap is a bit of an oddity, occasionally good, but mostly very very average. Still, it mostly amuses, and seeing Stefan Dennis on our tv screens once again is shockingly no bad thing. And I never thought I'd say that. Ever.
King of the Hill (20:30, Thursday 20th September, Sky One)
Back for it's fifth series and still as fine and wittily dry as ever. The only animated prog. not yet to disappoint. But then I'm sure it's only a matter of time.
Coupling (22:00, Monday 10th September, BBC2)
Okay romantic comedy, with a decent enough cast, but which is trying to hard to be the UK version of Sex and the City. Fine, and amusing at times, but never anything more.
Never Mind The Buzzcocks (21:00, Monday 10th September, BBC2)
Was this ever funny? Does anyone really like Phil Jupitus? And what is a talented comedian like Mark Lamarr doingon a show like this? Not as bad as They Think it's All Over, but getting closer by the week.
Bedtime (22:35, Wednesday 5th September, BBC1)
Claustophobic but enjoyable drama set in three adjoining bedrooms. It’s a tad far fetched, but the cast all shine, and this alone saves it from becoming too melodramatic and ridiculous. Nice. Enough.
Stanley Kubrick: A Life In Pictures (23:20, Monday 3rd September, BBC2)
Superb three part documentary on the life of Stanley Kubrick that is part autobiography and part filmography. Dully narrated by Tom Cruise, but packed with interviews with important figures from his life, and clips from his work. One of only a few unmissable programmes shown this year.
Hollyoaks: Moving On (22:30, Monday 3rd September, C4)
Supposedly adult spin off from the once comical but now tedious soap. Infact bar a plotline revolving around sex toys, and a tad more cleavage, it’s pretty identical to it’s sister programme, and there was really no need for it’s creation. Unsurprisingly disappointing.
Lorimar Black (Rufus Sewell lookalike James Frain) is a loss adjuster for a large company run by George Hogg (Stephen Rea, clearly delighted to be getting his teeth in to such delicious material for the first time in years) who investigates the burning down of a hotel and discovers various levels of corruption within various different companies. And while he tries to work out exactly what is going on, he has to cope with his car being viciously vandalised, a severe beating, the death of his father and a romantic obsession with a woman from a tv advert. Simple black and white drama this isn’t in the slightest.
Catherine McCormack brings depth back to Black’s almost soulless life as the advertising model Lorimar tracks down after seeing her on tv and gradually falls in love with. James Fox gets to do his privileged member of the upper class 'thang' again, though this time with a more malevolent streak, whilst Neil Pearson pops up as a dodgy but almost tragically ineffective builder.
It’s the chemistry between Rea and Frain, the unpredictability and intelligence of the script, and the for once stylised direction that made it such a pleasure though. If you missed it, it’s available to buy on DVD and video. And even if you didn’t, it’s still worth buying. Yep. That Good.
Two positive reviews in one update? No, you haven’t gone quite mad, for it does happen on occasion - but sadly not half as often as we’d like. But for a change the BBC’s main channel has delivered a witty, clever and sharp drama in a peaktime slot. These are strange times indeed.
Written by novelist Colin Bateman, whose Divorcing Jack limped on to the big screen a couple of years ago, which, despite a decent performance by David Thewlis, failed to really interest. It was far too episodic and never really capturing the bite of the book, but this is straighter, more conventional stuff, and it does what it sets out to do extremely well.
Jimmy Nesbitt is Thomas Murphy, a hard bitten undercover cop with a dark past, who infiltrates an Undertakers which is a cover for diamond theft and heroine dealing. Of course there’s plot twists, some predictable, some not, Nesbitt gets to deliver all the best lines, and the rather marvellous Mark Benton (best known for a supporting role in Mike Leigh’s Career Girls) gets to be a hip, caring priest and help Nesbitt come to terms with his demons.
It’s supposedly just a one off, but if viewing figures were good then a series is possible, and if Bateman was to handle the writing duties again, it’d be more than welcome.
Temptation Island (22:00, Sunday 23rd September, Sky One)
So it’s no real shocker that Sky One’s hugely expensive foray in to the reality genre is rather fun viewing. Based on the US version, which C4 has only recently finished showing, this separates
It’s tempting to grumble about reality tv being exploitative of basic humanity, but then isn’t most tv? Doesn’t it try and moralise and force network approved social beliefs upon us all? At least fluff like this never tries to take itself too seriously – and how could it, as the basic idea is too split up happy couples and televise sex. And after both Big Brothers, Castaway, Survivor et al, I’m sure all of the people who applied to appear on it are aware of the negative as well as positive effects a brief 15 minutes of fame can have on a person.
Sure, it’s all a tad over dramatic, and the music is ridiculously O.T.T., but that only adds to the sense of fun anyhow. It’s kind of the reverse of Sky’s own The Villa in that it looks to break up couples rather than create them, but it’s equally as hedonistic, and fun to watch. Ed Hall, once of the rather marvellous ITV latenight tv review show ‘The Haunted Fishtank’, is the perfect presenter, a kind of male Davina, cheeky but immediately likeable, and he clearly relishes the work (but then who wouldn’t?).
When you want to stop thinking, and just laugh at the idiocy of the world, there’s no better show on at the moment.
Jim Davidson: A Bit Futher (22:40, Friday 21st September, BBC1)
But now they’ve just gone too far. By giving Jim Davidson yet another show, another harrowing half hour of supposed comedy, with all the racist, homophobic and misogynist jokes you’ve come to
And, fuck me, a song at the end? They really are taking the piss allowing such self-indulgence. And it’s just not on anymore. Alas, not paying the fee may result in prison, and in the current climate any acts of violence against the corporation are probably unwise. Thus only by boycotting all BBC programmes will change happen. And change really needs to happen right now.
You know you can kick your Eastender’s habit. If you’re Animal Hospital withdrawal symptoms are too harsh, you could always pay your local vet to let you watch him work all day long. And to replicate Casualty, just get pissed and do something really, really stupid. It really is that simple. And probably a lot more fun than sitting in and watching the dross the Beeb produces day in day out.
After all, how long is it before they bring back Noel Edmonds. And do we really want to risk letting that happen? Our children would never forgive us, after all.
Millennium (21:00, Tuesday 18th September, Sci-fi Channel)
The final episode of Millennium’s second series saw a devastating plague mark the end of the world, with his wife dead, Frank Black (Lance Henrikson) had questionably lost his sanity, and
That was the first time that tv just hadn’t made sense to me – a lead character had been left in a horrific situation and there were no further episodes to be made. But it was pretty much from that point on that I began enjoying tv which challenged established conventions, did something new and original. And whilst over the years I’v been mostly disappointed, especially where US fare is considered, Millennium delivered thought provoking, intelligent and at times uncomfortable drama. I’m not a religious man, but the way it played around with established beliefs couldn’t fail but to intrigue the most hardened atheist. It was at the very least never predictable, and, at it's best, exhilarating viewing.
But the series producer’s left, a replacement found, and Lance Henrikson expressed concern over some of the story lines from the previous series and made it quite clear he’d prefer a return to the F.B.I. based plotlines from the first series. And so it happened, and for some still unknown reason, Sky One decided not to show the third season, despite the fact that their parent company Fox were the makers of the show, and thus it wasn’t as if they’d have to fork out much for it. But they just decided to let down their audience once again, anyhow. Luckily the Sci-fi Channel recently purchased the rights. Well. Not luckily. Not really.
Because I prefer to think that Millennium ended with the finale of it’s second series. With the end of the world. Because whilst the destruction of our species may seem a little grim, watching a formulaic cop show of the week is even worse. Sure, Frank’s still got his psychic powers, but the whole supernatural aspect of the show has been completely removed, and the killers are all too human and familiar. There’s dozens of shows out there that cover this material, and just no need for Millennium to become another one of them.
Unfortunately due to recent events, the situation has been made even more ridiculous as the Sci-fi Channel decided not to show the season opener, but the ninth episode, making the situation all the more confusing. As we don’t wish for the whole series to be ruined, we haven’t read in-depth descriptions of the final episodes, but the general theme seems to centre around Black hunting down the Millennium group as they’re a bunch of crazy cultists, and despite all that he has seen, believes them to be wrong - one final insult to the viewers’ intelligence.
Co-produced by Steve Coogan, I imagine / hope he’s desperately trying to disassociate himself
To be fair, there were probably at least two moments where I laughed out loud, though weakly, at some Tim Vine’s puns (who despite everything occasionally wins me over with his impish charm). To be unfair, the majority of the rest of the half an hour was filled with shockingly tired jokes, all too familiar comedy situations, and a couple of sketches (like the one set in an airport for example) which left me staring at the screen in disbelief.
That this is on at half ten at night beggars belief, as it’s so inoffensive (apart from to lovers of comedy) and mild mannered that it could have easily been broadcast during children’s tv. Dull, weak, and any other word you could use to describe incredibly tepid humour.
‘Orrible (21:30, Monday 10th September, BBC2)
Whether or not Johnny Vaughan is a fine comedic talent is open to question, (personally I think he’s fine when presenting/improvising, but terrible when scripted) but as an actor he’s pretty awful, mugging at all times and desperate to look as stupid as possible. Based around the idea that Vaughan’s character is desperate to break in to gangster style crime, but clearly being far too inept to ever make it, there are a few decent jokes, and the polite and honourable pub landlord works well, but the large mix of characters just don’t gel together well.
Ricky Grover’s toned down version of his eleven
However, we noticed about half way through that Vaughn’s character is named ‘Paul Clark’, which lovers of reality tv will immediately recognise as also being the name of the now infamous Big Brother 2 contestant. And if you take the programme to be a unofficial biography of Mr Clarkes life post Big Brother, it suddenly becomes the funniest television programme ever made. Ever.
But we’re being a tad silly. Of course the name thing is entirely coincidental, the comedy is utterly uninspired, and once again another hugely paid, big tv name has failed to deliver.
The only reason I watched this was due to the involvement of Russell Davies, the creator of Queer as Folk, and with vague hope that this would be as good as the former programme.
Of course it wasn’t, not even close, but it was an amiable enough attempt at putting a spin on the romantic comedy, and far better than anything ITV have produced in the genre in a long time. It lacked the frenetic energy and snappy one liners of QAF, but the far more relaxed pace suited the romantic theme well, and there was nothing on display that you could actively dislike.
The concept is a simple one (it is ITV after all), being that Bob (Alan Davies) is a middle aged gay teacher, who meets and begins to fall for Rose (Lesley Sharp). And that’s it so far. But as this is only the first of a six part series, no doubt we’ll see much struggle and philosophising on the nature of homosexuality and love in general.
If only it wasn’t Alan Davies in the lead role, this could have been something rather special. But he’s the most uncomfortable romantic lead I’ve ever seen, whether playing gay or straight, and looks utterly unconvincing (and slightly scared) when about to kiss or shag anyone. He’s fine when delivering the comedic lines, just not when it comes to the romantic side, which is a pretty major failure considering that the emphasis so far is on the romance.
Worth watching, but not in any essential kind of way.
Absolutely Fabulous (21:00, Friday 7th September, BBC1)
But perhaps it was because people knew that they were being given just a pale imitation, and not the real thing, that it performed so poorly, and thus it wasn’t that much of a surprise when the Beeb announced a new series of Absolutely Fabulous.
It’s a confusing situation, as half of me loves Ab Fab, but, alas, the other half finds it a little too ridiculous sometimes. And I know that’s the point, but sometimes a lighter touch is needed. The main problem I have with the series is Edina, as she irritates rather than amuses, though I suppose with such a strong cast around, certain characters were always going to look less strong.
A few of the jokes seem very familiar, but that seems to be expected these days once a series passes it’s second series, and overall I do like the show. Just not as much as I want to.
My Family (20:30, Friday 7th September, BBC1)
I failed to watch the first series of this sitcom due to general sickness relating to BBC sitcoms – Lee Evans: So What Now being the final nail in the coffin, but as I was subdued by flu, and unable to find anything else worth watching, I reluctantly chose to watch My Family.
Created by former Larry Sanders scribe Fred Barron, this is about as established as comedy formats get, which is surprisingly considering how innovative The Larry Sanders Show was. It’s simply based around the antics of a supposedly typical family, and if you compare it other sitcoms that use the same format, say The Simpsons or The Royle Family, it comes out of the situation badly damaged. Perhaps more damningly, it isn’t really very different to Keep it in the Family, an ITV sitcom made over twenty years ago.
Having said all that, it’s not actually that bad. Robert Lindsay and Zoe Wannamaker do their damnedest to wring every possible laugh out of the script, the kids for once actually can act. It’s never weak, but it’s never that strong, which is a shame considering the cast seem to be actually able to act for once.
One of those sitcoms that at least doesn’t offend, and is at the very least amiable at times. But never anything more than that.
Alas success always seems to ruin BBC tv shows, or greed does anyway, as this has been moved to a primetime BBC1 slot, an hour earlier than it’s prequel, and was all the less interesting for it. An unneeded voice over informed us over the main credits of the idea behind the series, just incase anyone was confused by the title, and this was the first of many examples of how the series has been dumbed down during it’s transition to BBC1.
Set several years after the first series, the original, younger and more intelligent Conan Doyle,
Dr Joseph Bell (Ian Richardson) is Conan Doyle’s mentor, the character Sherlock Holmes is reportedly based upon, cool, clinical and always right, of course. And it’s Richardson, and Richardson alone who makes the drama worth watching, but even his superb portrayal cannot save this from being a rather tepid affair, especially when he has to deal with such a poor supporting cast.
Alexander Armstrong was the worst offender, playing the local Doctor, Turnavine, as if performing a parody of the character on his sketch show, whilst the show’s main love interest, Ms Heather Grace (Katie Blake) was reasonably unconvincing too, and it came as little surprise that she was one of the culprits behind the various crimes.
Plotwise it came across as very similar to that of your standard Jonathon Creek mystery – something very strange/impossible takes place, that may or may not be supernatural, and a logical and extremely clever expert comes along and solves it. There’s more to it than this, but not really that much of interest.
Half way through watching it I realised I’d been cleverly tricked by the BBC, and this is infact just a remake of Inspector Morse mixed with a little Jonathon Creek and Columbo, and with only a Victorian setting and slightly less alcohol consumption marking any differences. Richardson is marvellous in the role, don’t get me wrong, but the relationship he has with Doyle is so similar to that of Morse and Lewis that I’m surprised that Colin Dextor hasn’t sued. And the ending, where Bell pulls of a Columbo-esque ‘there’s just one more thing….’ seems very tired in this day and age.
Whilst it’s supposed to be based on Holmes, it’s clearly been influenced by so many other detective drama’s that it’s hard to see anything original in the series bar the innovative premise. Alas, once again the BBC have screwed up big time.
The Soprano’s (22:00, Sunday 2nd September, E4)
A US programme that’s still consistently amazing and it’s in its third series? Surely that’s impossible? Well, okay, it has happened on occasion, but not recently. But it’s not just that, anyway. The Soprano’s is simply one of the best drama’s in tv history, of filmic quality every week, and as we watch Tony come to terms with Mafia live, therapy, and modern day morality it’s never less than utterly captivating.
This week’s story involved a standard cash pick up go terribly wrong, and Paulie and Christopher soon finding themselves in the snow covered woods with what they think is a dead body. Meanwhile Tony’s juggling his new girlfriend with work to mixed affect, and Meadow suspects her new boyfriend, Jackie jnr, is cheating on her, and decides to find out.
If you compare that brief plot outline to any other standard drama that the US has produced recently it should make you laugh out loud, especially, say, if you were to compare it to the plotlines in Ally McBeal or any of the ridiculous amount of cult/sci-fi dramas that abound in the US schedules at the moment. Infact it makes it’s televisual peers look so tedious in comparison that I’m surprised we haven’t seen a whole host of imitators appear since it began, but then presumably tv bosses just knew not to even dare compete with something this good.
The allegations that the program is racist are ridiculous. It just represents a certain, small portion of Italian American life, and surely it should be programmes like Friends that should be attacked, for portraying an Italian American as a dumb stud, or Frasier, for not representing the minority at all (or any minorities infact).
That it will last for another two series, after creator David Chase picked up fifteen million dollars for agreeing to this, worries though, as keeping this level of quality up must be near impossible. But if they manage it, we’ll be left with twenty six more episodes of one of the greatest tv series ever made.
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