Hoorah! Another flirty, self-promoting chatshow host. Just what the world needs. Sarah Michelle Gellar at least proved that she's not completely detached from reality, but most of the time Blackwood fluttered his eyelids and tried to make her laugh, rather than, shock horror, ask her anything interesting, and ultimately you'll have learnt very little from this over long prog. Not bad for a Sky One show, but that's just more damning with faint praise, and aren't we all getting a little tired of that?
Dream Team (8pm, Sundays, Sky One)
Okay, so all the constraints of being a soap opera have never led to this being the best television has to offer, but Dream Team used to be better than most. Though always a tad over the top, it was never too ridiculous, and never took itself too seriously. But this last season has seen a real decline, with rejects from Neighbours and The Bill joining the cast, and the plots becoming even more fantastical/non-sensical. And now it's just as irritating as any other soap. Slightly better than Footballer's Wives, but only just.
Teachers (10pm, Wednesdays, C4)
Is this the smuggest comedy drama ever seen? Damn, if it weren't for Manchild it'd win the award easily. But it's pretty damn close to being so, anyhow. Whilst at times it's fluffy and non-vomit inducing tv, Teachers is far too neurotic and repetitive to be truly enjoyable. Most of the characters around Simon (Andrew Lincoln) seems to realise he's a self-obsessed semi-obnoxious prat, who each week whines incessantly, but that doesn't seem to have stopped them from liking and conversing him, and watching something with a lead character who's so self pitying and pathetic becomes tiring all too quickly. The soundtrack's good though - but go out and buy the cd rather than actually watch this nonsense.
Does Doug Know (10.35pm, Fridays, C4)
A sure sign of a piss poor programme is when the studio audience struggle to do more than occasionally chuckle, and in this latest topical news panel based gameshow it appears that they're all in coma's. But who can blame them, as this lazy, tired, seen it all before rubbish is the nadir of all of the recent panel show. Yes, it's even worse than They Think It's All Over. Daisy Donovan's supposedly ironic 'aren't I the most beautiful woman in the world' routine is getting more tiresome by the second, and when she hysterically laughs at yet another piss poor joke, it's impossible not to cringe/wish she was presenting some crap on an obscure digital tv channel that you never watch. Ignore. Avoid. Destroy. Whatever you feel is necessary.
South Park (10pm, Saturdays, Sky One / 11.05pm, Thursdays, C4)
The fifth series of South Park is currently running on both Sky and C4 (with Sky about six or seven episodes ahead of it's terrestrial competitor), and those who lost interest during it's dodgy third year should rush back to their tv screens, as now that its in it's fifth season, and darker, funnier, and yet sillier than ever before, South Park is really hitting it's stride. From Cartman gradually becoming more and more evil, to losing his sense of humour, he's become the real centre of the show, and it's really benefited from it. Sure, there's always the odd poorer effort, which is inevitable when US networks insist of seasons of 20+ episodes, but when the hit rate is as high as it as the moment, you can't really complain. So we won't.
Enterprise (8pm, Mondays, Sky One)
Sheesh, all this pc posturing and old style heroics sure is boring. After seeing Voyager destroy the whole Borg collective in it's last episode, before making it home in the final moments, I'm sure the last thing Trek fans ever wanted to see was a crappy ship getting the shit beat out of it by 23rd Century aliens. This is the worst set of actors to feature in Trek series yet. Scott Bakula's too wooden an actor to carry off the Captain's role, and it's all so dull compared to the Next Generation's standards.
It benefited from being far more honest, yet pleasantly non-cringeworthy, than this sort of thing usually is. Harry's mostly unlikeable at the beginning,
Both father and son's Star Wars obsession was a little grating though, partially because it's been done so many times recently, and also as, for god's sake, it's not that special a movie series. And at times events did become a little too cloying - especially those set in the hospital, but the script was mostly well written, though not quite as sharp as the book it was based on. But that's pretty inevitable, it seems, with nearly all tv adaptations.
All the performances were wonderful, fortunately, which really saved the day, with Ioan Grufuud, Natasha Little and Elizabeth Mitchell all making for appealing leads. Pauline Collins as Harry's mother was also a delight, finally acting her age, even Ian McShane was mostly fine as a slimy chatshow host, and the child actor who portrayed Pat (Dominic Howell) seemed completely comfortable infront of the camera. Which makes such an oh so pleasant change, and was oh so important too.
Ultimately this was still set in a semi-fantasy world where money, luxuries and job security and the like are never questioned nor seemingly needed, and their lives seem to be a little too convenient at times - Harry gets fired just when he needs time to spend with Pat, but is later able to work part time so that he's always there for his son. And of course the final dash to the airport to save the relationship routine is the stuff of cliché, but at least it was handled well, and the feel-great ending was much needed.
It's easy to see why it debuted on the small screen rather than the silver one - as ultimately it had little to say other than 'kids make your life complete'. But as tv comedy drama's go, this was far more impressive than most, and certainly more than watchable.
Black Books (9.30pm, Fridays, C4)
I loved the first series, but only quite like the second. It's the closest we've got to a British
Seinfeld, as the first series was essentially about nothing, but watching them do so little was so much fun. But they've lost their way a little this time around (and a co-writer, Father Ted's Graham Linehan, too) and the plotlines have become increasingly surreal, which hasn't helped, and so far this series the gang have had to teach a ex-con how to read, turned the bookshop in to a restaurant, and countless other all too bizarre incidents
Dylan Moran's Bernard is too much of a bastard these days, and no longer as loveable as he once was. Fran (Tamsin Greig), always the weakest character, has become just too annoying, though Bill Bailey's Manny is the real star of the show, and still as absurdly wonderful as before. But it's just not the same. Proliferated with too many, often pointless, guest stars, like Johnny Vegas, Ricky Grover and Jessica Stevenson, it's lost some of its charm, which is a real shame.
There has been a lot of great moments though, which ultimately has saved the show from being just another average sitcom. From Manny suffering from Dave's Syndrome, Bernard calling Manny 'Dad', Fran giving a presentation at her new job despite not knowing what she's doing, to small children disappearing down sofa's, there's a lot to laugh at, but alas the unfortunate nagging feeling that it just isn't as funny as it once was spoils things a little.
Hopefully there won't be a third series, as 12 episodes is enough, and Dylan Moran and Bill Bailey deserve to go on to even greater things. And Tamsin Greig deserves to go straight to the job centre.
Alex Finch.
I agree with the Seinfeld comparison, but that's more or less all I agree with Alex about. Let's face it, Elaine never had the best lines in Seinfeld, but she was still funny, ditto with Tamsin Greig.
I think that whilst this series has not ben as consistently funny as the last, I can remember weak moments in the last series; notably the one when "Manny ate Bernard's Bees". Even though we've seen Manny playing the piano upside down with spoons; Black Books become a hybrid of Waterstones and Starbucks, and Fran's room change in size, people still see this series as lacking something.
To be honest, the novelty had worn off, but it was still very funny in places, and I think Dylan Moran has enough gumption to write a classy third series after this above average sophomore effort.
Craig Aston
Another, more serious, problem with 24 is that whilst it looks like a lots happening, with multiple split screen action and several different story arcs, it's a little preposterous at times, what with a lesbian hitwoman who's quite prepared to kill her lover, none of the characters ever even considering the idea that sleep is a pretty pleasant thing to do, and it certainly seems that the writer's just aren't sure what to do with Jack's wife, who's been stuck driving around downtown for the last four hours, looking for her daughter without much success.
Despite the above criticism's, it is a programme you have to admire. Unlike the majority of US fare, this doesn't insult the audience's intelligence, and follows in the tradition of Twin Peaks and Murder One in telling one long, if occasionally convoluted, story. It's not as good as the wonderful The Soprano's (though that is the best drama I've seen in all too long), and more on the same level as CSI and The West Wing. So not essential television, and despite claims to the contrary, missing an episode won't confuse in the slightest, as with all US show's there's a huge amount of exposition throughout, but it is fun enough for the time being.
Rescue Me (9pm, Sundays, BBC1)
It took me a couple of weeks to get in to this romantic comedy drama sex and the city esque show, but after the Beeb's relentless advertising campaign, plus a handy Friday night repeat, it's finally started to grab me. Sally Phillip's is all of Sex and the City's characters rolled in to one, a mix of naivety, sluttiness and all knowing agony aunt. More enjoyable, and less preachy than SATC, it's hour long running time allows it to explore it's themes in depth, rather than skimping over them in the flimsy fashion that Carrie and co always seem to do so.
Phillips' Katie Nash isn't always right either, and refreshingly, the staff behind Eden confess that what they're doing is trivial and at times pointless, unlike Carrie's weekly common which she seems to believe is the new New Yorker's Bible. Another problem I have with SATC, is that it suffers from a dearth of well written male characters - Big's a traditionally flash bastard, Aidan a simple but strangely arsey bloke, whilst only Steve gets your sympathy, and that's mainly due to having lost a testicle last season. Of course he's seen as not good enough for boyfriend material because of his lack of ambition - he's simply happy where he is, which is something none of the girls can handle.
And whilst Rescue Me has it's fair share of one dimensional male (and female) characters, in Eddie we're presented with one of the finest male characters seen in years in any programme. Yes, he's overweight, and hopelessly in love with Katie, but it doesn't make him weak and pathetic, indeed he's far more moralistic, honest and self-aware than any of the other characters, And the show is made so much more enjoyable due to his presence.
So if you havent started watching this yet, do so now, it's accessible, intelligent and always smile increasing tv.
Clifford's not a man to be admired, of course, but anyone who really cares about his tabloid exclusives takes life all too seriously anyway. So you might not have learnt that much about the man himself, perhaps more importantly, during the time spent filming him it was revealed just how easy it is to manipulate, well, anyone, including the press, Louis, and sick children suffering from cancer.
For the first time I'm beginning to become tired by Louis' false naivety. Its impossible to sympathise with him when he acts hurt at being misled by Clifford, and his whining and occasional snide laughs or comments have really started to grate. Louis joked at one point "You're turning the tables on me Max, and I can't handle it" and whilst it's all tongue in cheek, you have to question why he seemed so surprised that Clifford is playing with him so, and why Louis is puzzled that Clifford is unwilling to allow his whole life and work to be shown in the film. For he must know that he mostly deals in lies and mistruths, and uncensored coverage of this would have left his career in tatters.
A return to non-celebrity documentary's is definitely needed if Louis' feet are going to be kept anywhere near the ground, and his programmes are going to be anywhere near worth watching.
Alex Finch.
Again, I only disagree with Alex over minor points. I agree that the time spent with Max Clifford, "The greatest propaganda machine since Gerbles" was more than rewarding, but I also think Alex was unfair to Chris Eubank.
This is someone who obviously feels that they should extend their showmanship in order to win people over. Kinda' like Geri Halliwell, and you have to feel sympathy for such attention-seekers, even if you don't agree with their agendas. I missed the Ann Widdecombe and Keith Harris specials, but I agree that Max Clifford was probably the best subject Louis Theroux dealt with.
Craig Aston
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